Apr 5, 2013

body blow

I sat in the oncologists office on Thursday. He's a great specialist- gives the hard truths while holding out hope. My Dad's other radiation oncologist hasn't been so good at actually telling the truth so this was to get my Dad to understand the severity of his condition.

It felt like physical blows, my friends, hearing all those words. I know the real deal but hearing them was super hard. And watching my Dad's face as he heard them too was awful.


When life is horrible I like to look at these little people. They are light and hope to me. This little pretty thing makes a relationship and connection out of anything. She turns her brothers truck into a house with families. Love that. I see the glue that will hold a family together one day in her. She's gorgeous x


  1. BIG love and hugs... prayers being sent your way again and again!

  2. Big hugs to you Sammy. It's nice to have those wee people to distract you from the heartbreak. x

  3. Sammy....totally heart breaking. Loving you x

  4. Hi. I've been away from bloggy world lately... yours is the first I've read for a number of weeks... and I can so identify. I know how words can hit hard, like the body blows you talk about. Been there, done that, felt it. It sux. (one of the reasons I've been MIA from blogging). Just want to send all my love to you and your family at this time. Much love xx Neetz x

  5. I hereby promise to give you a HUGE BIG hug when I see you next week!!! Love your attitude. J x

  6. I remember "that day" as clear as if it was yesterday....when the Doctor called us all in and told us there was nothing more he could do...did we want to tell dad or did we want the doctor to tell him...of course we opted to be the messengers....though my dad was in denial...at first My parents were very private-keeping many things from us. I am not really sure when or if he ever surrendered....

    I do remember going home and holding my little man close...
    they give such comfort those little beans

    holding you and your family close

    love and light

  7. Gorgeous girl :) Big hugs and lots of love - i admire your courage xx

  8. Hey babe, God knows just what we need in these times. For both of us, it would seem, He speaks hope and comfort through our kids.
    I talked to my Dad the dad before he passed. It was both the most heartbreaking thing and the most needed gift for me. He told me he knew it wasn't good. And I came off the phone helpless and crying hard. Olivia piped up and said that it was ok. The Jesus wanted him home.

    And only she could've said that to me.

    Damn it. Now I am crying.

    Anyway, it's horrid, awful, IT SUCKS.
    But He gets it. And He gives strength and comfort in a way that only He knows how it will help YOU. You have such preciousness packaged up in two beautiful blessings. Enjoy them through this relentless pile of shite. 'scuse me.xx

  9. Love you so much.
    Feeling like a completely useless friend.
    I will make up for it at Christchurch.
    I will buy all your coffees. OKAY??
    And make sure you get all the peace and quiet you need.
    I can supply reading material to last for months; distract you from reality for a bit.
    And though I missed the boat on the Gin front (somebody beat me to it, who was ACTION rather than WORDS) I can try to redeem myself somehow.
    Cos I think of you so often, and I feel so helpless not knowing how to show you that i care, and I'm here for you.

  10. Thanks Simoney, I know you are always there for me. Looking forward to catching up in Chch xxx

  11. Lots and lots of crafting nights and bloggy coffees and crocheting sessions as often as you need them xxx
    Love you sweetheart xxx

  12. Oh Sammy, I feel so inadequate to find the words to say.
    My heart is breaking for you and your family.
    I continue to hold you in prayer. Praying for God's peace over you.
    Bless those precious little children of yours, you and your family.


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